Hi and welcome to "Put It In My Pie Hole." I thought I would introduce myself and share with you my story of how I got to be who I am today. I'm Samantha, when I'm in trouble, but most people call me Sam.
I began my health awareness journey about 6 years ago after a very long and hard divorce. We were high school sweethearts and together for 11 years, we lived the Army way of life and had a special needs son. But we fought constantly, we weren't happy and we were the worst thing for each other so we made the decision to cut our losses and go our separate ways.
There was a moment that I will never forget, when I knew my life was never going to be the same. I had just pulled out of my driveway and I was creeping down our street. My car was packed full with our belongings, my son, in his car seat in the back. I stopped for a second and looked back at him and then I looked in my car's back window and saw my house faded off into the distance. It hit me, the future I thought I had was no longer going to be my future, that life was gone. I began to sob uncontrollably but I turned around in my seat, I looked forward and began to drive again. I realized that this was my new life, my new beginning. I got a do over and I was determined to not fuck it up again.
So many thoughts flooded my head at night; I had no job, since I had been a stay at home mom. I was moving in with my parents 4 and a half hours away(can you say shame) and I was a single parent to an Autistic child. I wondered how the hell I was going to do this. I was struggling with my self worth, not feeling good about my situation and stressed the f*** out about bills but I was free of everything else. I knew I needed to change to better myself and it all started with getting a job, then an apartment, then working out and eating healthier. I began to noticed I had a bad relationship with food. I loved to eat but I used to see it as such a negative thing. I felt like it controlled me. I would binge, then feel shame, so I would deprive myself, then feel shame again... it was a viscous cycle. Due to my stress and lots of working out I lost a ton of weight so much in fact, that I had began to eat away at my muscle. As soon as I saw this I joined a local gym, began to weight train and thankfully gained it all back.
Soon after, I met my now husband Charlie and I can't say I've been perfect but I would say I am in a much better place now than I was back then. I have fallen off the band wagon a few times due to health problems, but I have always gotten back on as soon as I could physically do so. I have a better understanding of food and use it as fuel to feed my body. I no longer count those calories or macros. I just eat whole, nutrient dense foods and work my body everyday to make sure it is happy and healthy. I hope you will join me on your own healthy lifestyle journey.
Thank you for reading.
Sam
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